Post - Jenna Clare Photo

Recently I made a post talking about Banshees of Inisherin and the power of adult friendship, how sometimes we need to make the choice to leave people behind simply because we no longer want their company. And while that sentiment will always remain relevant and in some ways imminent, I have found a new piece to the puzzle.

With Hulu taking Black Sails off its backlist this weekend, I made it my mission to finally finish watching this show in its entirety. I had gotten about halfway through last year, intending to finish it somewhere down the line, but never fully committing. But now I’m sitting here after spending all week devouring the last two seasons, and I feel as if my center of gravity has shifted once again.

For those who don’t know the backstory on Black Sails, it’s a Starz show that originally ended in 2017 about pirates. It’s brutal and mature and dark, and it has gotten a cult following in the years since it’s aired. It’s a revolutionary (literally) imagining of the infamous Long John Silver’s origin story. Who was Silver before he lands on the pages of Treasure Island? How did the treasure come to be? What might it have been like to watch a group of pirates come together and unite against the colonial force of the British Empire? It’s perfect for fans of Game of Thrones, sufficiently gory with lots of politics and intrigue and even romance, but it does things that Game of Thrones only wishes it could achieve. While it’s only four seasons long, the story that is woven into forty hours of television is so compelling that by the end you’ll find yourself hollowed out and maybe even weeping. It’s hard to say what is the most impressive part of this series: the practical effects, the make-up, the acting, the writing itself…it’s all a little overwhelming. And while I may not rewatch this anytime soon (thanks Hulu). I can say that it definitely left an impact on me.

But what do pirates have to do with friendship?

Everything.

For those who have watched this show, you won’t need me to explain to you the connection between friendship and the rest of the story. Love is woven deeply into the threads of these characters’ journeys, and even though some might want to believe that romance is the driving force for these characters, I argue that friendship is what makes a bigger mark. And in fact, I think the show takes it one step further than that.

This isn’t a question of which is more powerful, romance or friendship, it’s actually a thesis on why it’s both and. You cannot have one without the other, and in some ways, when you reach the end of the story, they become synonymous.

Although this story explains how Long John Silver gets his start, it’s difficult to say who is the main character. Is it Silver who longs to weave a better story for himself? Is it Flint who longs to burn down the British Empire for taking his first love? Is it Rackham who wants the world to know his name? So many of these characters long to change the world and gain power no matter the circumstances, but in turn each of them has to choose: power or love? And while I think each of them would hate to be so vulnerable as to choose love, they are all doomed by the narrative from the start. Because what’s a life without love?

Part of what compelled me the most by this story is that very few pieces of media do a good job of blurring the lines between romantic and platonic partnerships. Or at least, not in a way that honors the friendship just as equally as the romance. Far too often creators lean into friendship only to scrub it all away by the end of the story in order to make room for the romance. The world we live in is so obsessed with romance being the end of the line, that they fail to elevate or explore friendship in a meaningful way. But this show does not do that, even if it seems to at the first glance.

I think everyone on this show is a little in love with each other. There are so many couplings and partnerships and polycules that at the end of it, it’s difficult not to see just how deeply each character cares for the others. If you talk about one relationship, it will inevitably bleed into three or four others, and soon you’re just talking in circles. Flint loved Thomas who loved Flint who loved Miranda who loved Flint who loved Silver who loved Madi. Max loved Eleanor who loved Charles who loved Jack who loved Anne who loved Max. Each character makes mistakes and earns back their forgiveness and fucks up over and over and over again, but at the end of everything, it’s about the love. And these relationships are romantic in nature, sure, any number of these people has slept with nearly everyone else, but at the heart of it lies the friendship. Even though no one has truly connected themselves through marriage or True Love, no one can truly let anyone else go because they simply Care about the well-being of their friends.

At this point, friend is such a measly word for the relationships in the story. Is there not a word bigger than that? If we are and are not partners, does that convey how much I care about you? Do you know that I would die for you? That I would throw myself into the battle if only to stop your suffering? Do you know that I would stand here and wait a day, a month, a year, forever just to make sure you are okay? If I am your friend, am I not also your lover?

This show presents itself as a love story. In the first half, we learn that Flint is driven by revenge for his lover(s) and we watch others (Eleanor, Charles, Max, Jack) trying to reckon with their own love stories. How can you love someone who’s betrayed you? How can you love someone who also loves another? How can your relationship with one person affect their relationship with someone else? The story centers on piracy and revolution, the desire to fight against a regime of colonists, but it also is about forgiveness and understanding and learning to trust the people you love. This is the second half: that sometimes you are forced to choose between changing the world and remaining safe with the person you love most. Love makes you vulnerable and it can make you weak…but it can also be your biggest strength.

Even though I think these ideas show themselves in all the pairings and various relationships, I think the best demonstration of a true romantic friendship is shown in the relationship between Flint and Silver. (Obviously.) Before I started the show, all I really knew is that people online saw a shared connection between those two that may or may not have been homoerotic in nature. I spent the first two seasons hopelessly confused and very unsure of how those two would ever forge such an intense connection to each other…but somehow the string of fate brings them together beautifully and it is now causing a ridiculous amount of Feelings on my end.

The Flint and Silver relationship is complex because it is not romantic in nature. Except that it is. And it’s not platonic in nature. Except that it is. And it isn’t really driven by love at all…except that it absolutely is. These two men are thrown together under the most bizarre circumstances, neither one really liking the other, and over the course of the series they are forced to realized that they not only need to trust the other to survive, but they can be wildly successful in doing so. They come to rely on each other when they are in their darkest moments, and after a while, they are the only two who can understand each other. They are mirrors and parallel lines and yet in many ways they are opposites. They are a dangerous pairing because they could use their combined power to burn down the world…or they could save it, and in doing so, save each other.

In the Flint/Silver partnership, it takes a long time for them to understand that they not only trust each other, but they do in fact care for each other. There is no inherent romance between them, no shared kisses or tender touching (on screen, although the fans may argue about off the screen), but that almost discounts the relationship between them. Their friendship and care blossoms into something so unique that the Act of romance is almost irrelevant. It suggests the idea that friendship alone is powerful enough to change the heart of another person, if only because you are leaning on faith and trust, rather than just the formalities and commitments of a romantic couple.

At the heart of this relationship, it feels like — I know you better than you know yourself if only because you know me just the same. You see my flaws and struggle against them just like I do when I look in the mirror. But that darkness does not stop us or scare us because we are both together in the dark, helping to guide each other along the path to redemption. I hate you for it so much so that I love you. And even though I will receive nothing in return, I will fight for it because you are the only person who sees me as I am because you are just the same.

Even though they don’t choose each other literally, if you take a closer look at the end of their stories, I think you’ll find that Flint and Silver do actually stand by each other. Their narrative was doomed from the beginning, two suns burning too brightly together, but they can’t bear to see the other one suffer. Even if they can’t have each other, even if they don’t particularly want each other, they respect their relationship. They continue to care.

I think so often society today elevates romance and partners as if no other love could be as intense or dramatic or interesting or complex or worthy. But I think these people are just not creative enough. There is something so powerful about these kinds of romantic friendships - the relationships that are destined for greatness not because of a literal coupling, but because two souls know each other so well that they make a silent vow to continue caring for the other to the end of the line. There is no promise of a happily ever after, there is no incentive to stay. The only thing that ties together friends is a desire to see another person become the best version of himself, and to have the opportunity to guide him there.

In many ways, a friendship is easier than a romantic partnership. In romance you often are committing to an eternity together, seeking marriage and a shared life and a shared lineage. You vow to stand together no matter what, and it can be challenging to do so, to give all of your time and yourself to another person. You open yourself up to so much vulnerability in those relationships because there is an intimacy that comes with marriage. You offer to give yourself up in order to become one. A friendship rarely asks for such sacrifice. You can live in separate homes, see each other a few times a year (or less), hide parts and pieces of yourself at your discretion…

But I think people fail to recognize just how challenging friendship can be. What makes friendship so romantic to me is that you are often bearing your entire soul with no promises, no commitments, no reason to stay. All you can do is hope that the other person cares enough to continue being apart of your life. And often times it doesn’t last that long. We give up hope, we stop caring, we change so much that we no longer recognize ourselves in our friendships…and without a contract to keep us connected, it is easy to walk away. Friendship has an easy out, it always does, but what’s harder is forgiving your friends, showing up for them even when you get nothing, trusting that in the long run they will pay you back for the things you give them of your own volition. Friendship is trusting that even when your friend is trying to shoot you, you will protect him because he is the only person who is allowed to kill you.

I have spent years of my life trying to convince myself that I don’t need romance and that I’m fine without it and that I would much rather be alone, but the truth is, I want it. I always have. And for a long time I thought that I’d never get to feel the things that my friends do. That I’d never fall in love or have a close, vulnerable relationship with another person. But now I don’t think that’s quite true. I think I’m starting to learn that I do have romance in my life, even if it’s unconventional. Even if this isn’t how other people see it, I do believe that I’m in love. In my own way, I have the true loves I’ve been seeking. My friends are the partnerships I choose to invest in. Not because I expect to get anything back, but because I care. Because these people are so fascinating and they try so hard to be good and they want to see me be good too.

on partnership and pirates